So, on the suggestion of my most reliable mentor, I fired off an email to [institution I'm currently waitlisted at] inquiring about my approximate position on the waitlist. According to aforementioned mentor, this technique is your best bet to get a final "yes" or "no" at these later stages in the game--and achieve the end of torment, so to speak.
A short one-act:
Wind: Blow, blow, blow.
Ebeff: Twist, twist, twist.
Prayer and I aren't on such good terms. Send one up for me.